I would like to take this time to commemorate the life that I lived before moving to Calgary. For what feels like more than a lifetime of multiple jobs and little-to-no benefits reaped from doing so, I can now proudly say that I am a ONE JOB HUMAN (not for long but let’s enjoy this while it lasts).
Five months ago I moved to Calgary in hopes of finding an affordable cost of living, and utilizing the extra distance from humans that I have allowed to contact me in my life to force me to spend more time focusing on my personal growth and careers. Five months ago I began an insurance course that takes an average 6 months for people to complete. I am nowhere near completion. In fact, I am failing. I am telling you this because it is going to be a large factor in my reasoning while explaining just how much less you get done when your life is suddenly moving more slowly than your fat ass moves after thanksgiving dinner and 3 bottles of wine. (Yes I said bottles and I meant it, wtf do you do on thanksgiving?!)
Rewind to the beginning of my move. I was busy, sorting out my life, finding new tasks to check off of my never-ending to-do lists. I studied, I explored, I made friends, I didn’t take a break from work. I was still in my “go, go, go” phase. Then, suddenly I began checking things off of my list and it grew smaller. Panicked, I began adding things like “Call property manager to get closet fixed” and useless to-dos that I may have normally done naturally in my ever-moving day. Yet for some reason I needed to do these things because my brain began to slow down. For some reason, being a student and working only one job has not only decreased my productivity level, but it increased my stupidity. I have fallen into this new society that I am only now learning to adapt to.
Living in a city that has a strange small town vibe, I found myself falling succumb to the surface level shit that the average human being engages far too much time in such as going out to dinner, drinking heavily and attending strange fitness classes in the hope that maybe I may not get fatter while being a sack of shit. My life slowed down to an insane pace that I never thought was humanly possible. I even stayed inside ALL day on a Sunday once. Who the hell have I become?
Traumatized and frustrated with my new-found shitty attention span, I began to really hate myself for this new life that I created. Why was I suddenly the least productive person that I have ever been? Why was I now okay with not being 110% on top of things? I began punishing myself and feeling miserable and angry.
But then it dawned on me.
My ideal of being “stagnant” were quantum leaps for a majority of society today.
I am still succeeding and pushing through faster and better than most people in a single day.
My level of motivations may have slowed down but I am still getting shit done day in and day out! (Adulting, yayyyy)
By focusing on my life NOW, I am realizing that yes, I can still be that go, go, go human that I am used to, but I simply have much more time than I am used to now that I’ve subtracted about 4 out of 5 jobs; and to be honest, that isn’t actually a bad thing. In fact, it’s showing that I am capable of kicking even more ass than a karate black belt on holocaust day.
Long story short:
The world is a fucking rad place with ample time to succeed, and if I want to sit in my pyjamas one day and hope to god the fire alarm doesn’t go off again, then I will do it. Because THIS is the time that I have to finally learn to enjoy my time without the agonizing, fuckery of stress that used to be my life back in burn-to-the-ground-in-debt BC.
I have time to RELAX(wtf is that?) AND SUCCEED (still confused).
Neesh Media 