Author Archives: tanishaoranchuk

Have you ever had one of those moments where you realize that the things that hurt you the most just might be your own fault? Those “haha” moments when you look at your past, your present and your future and a big heavy pit falls deep into the bottom of your stomach? I have. I’veContinue reading “Self Awareness: Part 1”

I used to think that I knew what I wanted.Or at least I used to pretend that I did.That was at least until I was offered what I wanted, and when I got it,I no longer wanted it. I wanted something more.What was that exactly? I’m still unsure.All I know was that it wasn’t whatContinue reading “Second Chance”

When a “fuckboy” meets a “fuckgirl”; worlds changeBecause suddenly, there are two alphas, Both of whom try to bite the neck of the other, In attempt to gain superiority, like canines. So much aggression, blood is shed, Like animals, refusing to give in to the loss.Neither willing to admit they are hurt, Refusing to step down and lose the battle.InContinue reading “Alpha”

This last year, I moved to the next province over from home. It is a mere 10 hour drive from home. Hardly anything. Can be done in a day. Could be a quick visit for anyone that needs it. Honestly? I’ve yet to have done such a thing. Perhaps blame it on my overtly stubborn personality where I refuse toContinue reading “Home is Where the Heart is”

I didn’t think that I would be in the position of giving many shits.I didn’t feel it could be possible in my drunken stuper. I spent so much time over indulging in booze in attempt to haze the feelings that I had, in attempt to lower my needs, to ignore my desires.Real talk, for theContinue reading “I’ve Got a Mic Drop for You”

I spent the winter in Calgary freezing my sorry little ass off and whining away at the down-turn of events that continuously happened to me. If you know me, you know that the series of struggles that occur in my day-to-day are a fucking joke. (Quite literally, we all laugh about it) But if there’s anything thatContinue reading “Everything is FINE”

I would like to take this time to commemorate the life that I lived before moving to Calgary. For what feels like more than a lifetime of multiple jobs and little-to-no benefits reaped from doing so, I can now proudly say that I am a ONE JOB HUMAN (not for long but let’s enjoy this while it lasts). FiveContinue reading “My Never Ending Life.. Not so Busy After all”

It’s funny to look back at this last year and think of the timeline on how life happened, how things have changed, who I was and who I have become. And by laugh, I’m genuinely laughing because it’s absolutely absurd how much trash gets thrown in my face over the course of a year whileContinue reading “New Year, Not-So-Same Neesh”

Day 1: My eyes were sore and puffy from crying for two full days before leaving,I got a speeding ticket 30 minutes into the drive (And up goes my Albertan car insurance),My cats peed in the kennel and rolled around in it before we could pull over,The cats finally slept, but so did my copilot, andContinue reading “Slow Progressions… I think”

I used to think the hardest part about leaving was the unknown. The idea that you don’t know what you have going forward.. That you will have to meet new people..And that you’ll have to find new things..New places, new routes, new favourite breakfast spots…  What I have never realized before, or maybe have never felt beforeContinue reading “Move it or Lose it”