Long before I was nineteen I knew that I wanted to be a server. I dreamt of the instant reward of cash after every shift, the short hours and the discount on meals. It’s bordering on the same temptations that prostitution has, minus the late nights, creepy old men, provocative dressing and- wait, never mind.
Serving is a different lifestyle. It takes a special kind of loud, fun and charismatic breed to be able to succeed happily in this industry. And yet, it’s the most frowned upon (but still socially acceptable) career choice to follow through into your 30s. Why? The stigma behind servers is that we’re all flirts that think a few inches lost in a dress, a batting of our eyelashes, and unnecessary laughs at not very funny jokes mean we’ll get the extra 5% tip. It’s that we’re sellouts, fake, try-hards, and sometimes are given the sly remark that we’re money hungry whores. Serving can actually be an incredible career for those individuals that can’t afford to go to university, or never had the means to find a decent career. Maybe they had children early, baby’s daddy was a loser and they needed the flexible hours and quick money. OR just maybe, they love the industry because it’s an incredibly positive, fun, energetic and exciting place to spend your time.
“Why would I give someone extra money when I’m already spending $100 on a meal? They make enough money, why do they deserve part of my 100k annual?” Many people seem to view tipping as an unnecessary thing, people in this industry should simply make more money hourly. I’m sorry sir, but if we all had a say in how much we got paid, Canada would be a much happier but VERY broke country. We don’t get to choose what we make, and if you really expect us to conjure up whatever “chicken, brown rice, extra carrot-sesame sauce, easy on the butter, no salt, no msg, throw in whatever mixed vegetables you have” entree you just invented off of our menu, then please, do us a favour and throw in an extra few dollars for the wrath of the kitchen that we just took for your own satisfaction.
Let me give you a bit of a damned lesson here;
Servers make below minimum wage in BC. It’s called serving wage (or liquor wage to some), and it’s $10.30 while proper minimum wage right now is sitting around $11.85. Why? Because we make our money with tips. The average expected tip nowadays is between 15-20%. This tip is not solely for the server, but it’s also for the hard-working (and also underpaid) cook that made your food, and the expeditor, hostess and manager that all took the time to assure your dining experience went smoothly. Servers do what is called “tip out”, which depending on the restaurant varies between 2 and 9%. This means that at the end of a servers shift, they must subtract (let’s use 5% for an easy equation) $50 of every $1000 that is sold.
So sir, you giving a server $5 on your $45 bill and telling her that she gave you the best service ever does not makeup for the $2.25 that she just lost.
Dress code has changed significantly since I’ve started working in restaurants. Skirts have a minimum length rather than a maximum (god bless) and women no longer have to wear heels, but, if you ask any professional or strange old man sitting at a table for 4 alone, you will find that it is nearly as socially unacceptable to wear thoughtful, comfortable shoes as it was to be a homosexual in the 50s. The rules may have changed, but the social stigma simply has not. So don’t mind me while I spend $50 on good insoles and complain about physical exhaustion after a 5 hour shift.
Speaking of shoes, I tracked my steps at work for a few weeks. On average, a semi-active adult will take about 4,000 steps a day. That includes getting up in the morning, going to work, going to workout after, etc. In one shift, it averaged out that I took 14,000 steps in 5.5 hours. OUR FEET ARE EXHAUSTED. Cut us some slack!
I can go on and on, AND ON, about large groups of walk-ins, overly picky eaters, fake allergies, after-last-call arrivers, purchasing new shoes every 3 months because you walk through them in days, paying out of pocket when some jackass decides to pay $50 on a gift card and then tips 20% on the remaining four dollars, lack of benefits, cost of hair and makeup, and the ridiculous all over the map hours that we receive… (I can keep going, I really can). But eventually, you would get sick of listening to me talk just as much as I get sick of listening to my ex boyfriend tell me he misses me and he’s sorry. The day would never end.
What I would like to see come out of this post is a better understanding from the average consumer of what it’s really like to work in this industry. It looks easy, many uneducated people can succeed in this industry, but it takes a certain kind of person to deliver the unexpected, personalized, mind-blowing experience that you are wow’ed by and that does not happen often. Please appreciate your servers. Tip your servers for what they deserve if they are amazing, tell management if they are doing a good job, and for the sake of our fucking sanity, please at the very least pause your conversation and interact with your server because we’re human beings too.
Neesh Media 